life is pointless



22.11.2025 mam dosyc
01.12.2025 mam dosyc, nie wazne co zrobie i tak bedzie zle, nie daje rady ze szkola, ale co to znaczy?
10.12.2025 nikomu nie życzę tego co mam teraz w życiu, nie mam siły nawet tego pisać, ale żyję, empatia i serce nie istnieją na tym świecie, to się już skończyło, teraz mamy matematykę i ai, a ludzie potracili rozumy do reszty

I am sorry for the fact that this bio is a one big rant, but its easier than hosting a blog, and most of my friends will read this page at some point.

FALSELY TERMINATED ON DISCORD IM WAITING FOR THEIR RESPONSE IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT MESSAGE ME ON OSU, IF YOURE BANNED ON OSU USE YOUTUBE, SOUNDCLOUD OR TELEGRAM

rip account of my friend from reddit who got banned for a known gif to ban discord accounts discord deletes accounts after exactly one year, i am waiting for a response from adr center (DSA is an EU law which could save me from losing my account)

discord scans EVERYTHING you send, images by an ai, messages by an algorithm to check for "pdf patterns" 💔🥀 or something like that its crazy ; be careful and for now use only vcs and ESPECIALLY avoid word shortcuts like checkpoint, sending only numbers in messages, avoid sending anything nsfw if you value your account and usage of discord (ban evasion is really hard), and discord keeps innocent people banned to idk hide actual bad people? theories are valid because of many things concerning discord and their new ceo.

lets just pray i will get the account back, because Im already going through too much rn

this is too much for me, im at the edge mentally. life hates me, theres no point in trying. i had so many ideas and dreams. everything into trashbin. depression came back just when it almost went away. idk you can try to make me happier, but my life wont be the same ever again. i wish the person who decided to add discord ai and not have humans in appeal section goes to hell. i probably deserve hell, too.

of course discord is discord, i probably wont get anything back. it hurts, their ai sucks, i and many people did nothing wrong by reposting a meme from twitter on an nsfw channel and well...

i have hard time especially on the mental side of myself, but on the physical too. if im back, i will message everyone who was close to me on that platform. the ban is unfair ; and well PSA dont repost low quality images which could be misinterpreted by ai to be something as bad as child ... on discord

"i wont leave you alone" how am I supposed to believe this when the world is collapsing in front of my eyes and every attempt of helping myself ends in a disaster because i wanted to feel better

Depression isnt a joke, i havent done anything bad and i am losing everything i had to this day, the last pieces of happiness. all is unfair, people you trust lie to you all the time to save their time, they dont care about the circumstances or literally ignore the fact they knew how we will suffer. And all i hear is that I should accept unfairness, move on, and ignore the fact that i have friends at their mental edge.

I dont understand the point to continue living on. If i still had discord, wasnt met with such unfairness everywhere including school, didnt have to go through breakups, my life would have been still okay. And the worst part? I, nor my friends, cant do anything about it.

All we can do is have hope.

nie mam ani jednej swojej rzeczy o ktora nie musialem bic sie i kojarzyc jej z bolem/zlymi wspomnieniami/ptsd

if you havent suffered much - stay thankful to your fate

hrt stands for hardcore regret torture, i just want the pain to stop. hrt is bad, due to bad consequences. additionally, my gf wishes i stay a boy, so thats another factor to consider.

sometimes i feel that i am really trans, like this is who i am and ive been holding it back for too long. other times it feels like its just loneliness, or desperation, or wanting to be loved in a way ive never been. i cant fully separate it. its like everything is mixed together and i cant tell what is actually me.

i think about it too much. like its some kind of escape, or maybe a chance to finally feel okay. not perfect, just okay. but i also know it wouldnt magically fix my life, my situation, or the way things are around me.

i just want to feel like myself. or at least feel something that isnt this constant confusion and heaviness.


from better news, recently i started to look good even to myself, despite the only change being longer hair (and i think more fem face, maybe due to stress or other factors, God exists so who knows).

i hate php, html, css, c++ and being sexualized out of my comfort range.

everyday i feel a huge pain in my head, idk if its due to my headphones, glasses, lack of sleep, depression or maybe everything at once????????

I WANT to be a girl, but almost every close person makes me regret wanting to myself.. gf due to orientation, parents due to idk, other people due to their stupidity.

normal people dont feel sadness when thinking about this. they dont think about this. those who hate others (people like me) overthink this shit 10 times more than i do, and are just too scared to come out.

i look gorgeous right now, all i want is other clothes and maybe other glasses. i hope she will still love me.

im tired.



i hate the fact i have severe serious health issues for 6+ years at this point and my parents dont want to do anything about it; maybe because treatement is paid or very risky, i think we can all sincerely blame one country for that... text like this could end up in an osu ban apparently 🤫

someone has a business in this, i hope all people who place money above someones life end up in hell