So let's talk about what happened to me. The first month after the devastation is really tough, if I say. The pain in chest is like eating the bullet that is shot from certain someone (You know who I am, if not, scroll down). Yes, that certain art, I think they know what art. Their gun point at me, and like wise, I am the victim eating it. Devastation brought me question about humanity and this society. I learnt a lot, but the most painful things: "Nothing lasts forever, even love". It made me sad to see how this society turns to be. Even promises can be broken. Certain guy said "It's just a promise, not a contract". Sure, but you know, even contract can be compromised. But it doesn't matter anymore, because, at the end of the day, this Alpha Cat will stand up again, and arise.

Say, they see me as a villain, a pecking pathetic one, right? I do a sweet payback. I got myself a stable j*b (I have to censor since some of you hate it). I got the score on 2 of Kroytz's 5★ Ascension to Heaven maps, cracked down Amnéhilesie by down and it might have triggered them to mock me, from what I heard from one of buddy. I even got myself recognized in 2 big osu! skinning compendium, that is skinship and osu!ck. And a guaranteed ticket to Skin of the Year 2026. I got honored by the university as well. 3 times of ascension. Along the journey, I made new friends, interacted with new people, and some of them are gods of TETR.IO and osu!, like Caboozled_Pie and 5han. Roleplaying/worldbuilding is going well, and many friends build the story together with me, in the Psi World. And even better, I got some friends, buddies that supports me throughout the journey in skinship server, one of them is surprisingly, Jianshyy‬.

So, the future of me on the gaming side. I have stated that, I am not going anywhere outside TETR.IO, osu! (And even more, Deemo, HeavenTravel). But, let's talk about my thoughts on osu! game.

osu! game has been out since 2007, and till this day (31/03/2026), it's nearly 20 years. I started this game, since April 2021, and I got a lot of ups and downs. I recalled the time I spent too much time on Seculo Seculorum, the time I made my way to top 3000 with Ascension to Heaven by Verti (kinda peak that every milestone of my growth in osu! game is always related directly to it), the time I suffered, damned and arise with 7★ pass on Oshama Scramble! (IOException Edit), and 5★ FC with Natural 20 on Introduction. It shaped my characteristics and at the old time, it was fun with love. But now, that kind of fun is no more. Instead, I switch to enjoying the game, rather than grinding for ranks, because it's just farming work, dude. Also, osu! game is where I start this skinning project, osu! Gacha Club, with sub-project, osu! Mg. I know, there will be buddies or pals, or people, who really inspired my work, and make a new sub-project inside osu! Gacha Club mega skinning project. The first season was the collaboration, and it's still a mixed skin. On the second season, and new seasons later, I am clear that I will make the project to compendium, as an original concept. And 2nd season got approved, moved to Completed skin forum, and featured in 2 compendiums in a row! This also happens to Season 3, Chapter 1 as well! Those are the big ascensions of my project.

There is one thing though, that I have discussed before in skinskip server. You know, old generations like players who starts from 2007-2023 are still on stable, and every skinning project is like, work fully on stable. But, starting from 2025, and even now, many new gen players chooses lazer over stable now, and people agree to the point, osu! lazer is a new future of osu! game (I heard that the community is like 60/40 favoured on stable instead of 80/20 like before, it is shifting). But here's the point. Current state of skinning in osu! lazer as of 31/03/2026 is really, extremely limited. Take an example, osu! lazer doesn't have combobursts. That is one of important things for my project, though it is trivial for others. The bigger example can be the song select interface, and result screen, both are forced to have same screen across the skins. And that's exactly how many skins that focuses on the UI customization on osu! stable get pecked on osu! lazer. Even at song select, we can't customize the SFX. And that sh*t hurts so much to me, to other skinners as well. Skinners like us can't control some stuff on the user interface, only gameplay. The only solution to this all hot garbage? We can only wish peppy to roll out the feature that we can do the UI Customization. If lazer can code to let people choose the classic UI and modern UI, then there's literally no point in staying stable. And not only that, but this issue must be completed. If both are completed, then old players who are active on skinning will move to lazer without any issue at all. And let's not forget about the pain I was suffering while playing osu! lazer. Lag spikes, Spotlights being terrible, etc...

And gameplay, of course. osu! really need more content to be alive, and especially, osu! catch. It is seriously in doormat now. Maybe... I think, BTMC got the point. Let me quote this:

"I think osu! is way too high of a base skill level game to get into. No one has made a genuine tutorial for this game that everyone can reference. Imagine if anyone wanted to get into osu!, what resource would you send them? There's nothing. There's no resource to send someone on how to get someone into osu!. How does someone learn streaming? There's no resource for that. How does someone get into mapping? Well, there was pishifat's videos and that's it. Like there's so much content, so many things that could be done about those two. No one is doing it."

And now, it's way more terrible into osu! catch. Say, you just go search "osu! catch tutorial" and there is only tips to improve, like this one. The only guide that I can remember is a guide that is written in Cato The Beat, but even then, it is an absolute wall of text, and no one would really spend a lot of time to pecking read that whole level of yapping. How do you do quick bursts? How do you play wiggle/hyperdash wiggle efficiently? How do you properly play edge dash that ensures you can actually catch the note? There's literally no resource for that, but only an answer: "Play more", done. That's it. And even worse, osu! catch stable score got like 0.96x, despite it having same pecking gameplay like osu! catch on lazer. It's really... Unfair. People really pointed out that, but it is a big silence since then. Also, beatmap spotlights. It did not work better, it drove people away more. I spit this based on play count of the season. And this is what I also heard from Crafterdark: "The catcher and plate being a single texture (also prevents new mod ideas). Hard mod customization impossible. Easy mod / Low CS hyperdash adjust possible but not worked on. Skin fruit rotation locked in by design. Can't share custom mod in Lazer without sharing a new ruleset". That is concerning.

This is dedicated section for TETR.IO, and Zenith Clicker. I think, as of 31/03/2026, I'm like 2-month player. Pretty new to this game though, but I have good impressions for this game. The TETR.IO Community is really, like... They gave me back to 2019 vibes, in a real way. They are friendly, and some taught me how to play this game better, and sometimes, how to properly build the openers. Two of the most powerful weapon I knew and I still use to this day, is Hachi-spin (I call it Hachi Cannon) and DT Cannon. And the game is really great at designing friendly UX/UI. Also, like I have mentioned in Chapter 2, I see a lot of TETR.IO god who are also gods in osu! game as well!

Tetra League is also a thing many people enjoy (or not when you are a B- rank and someone at B rank pop up and slap you real hard). And osu! game is also having something same like Tetra League, it's called quick play? Anyways, there is also one of the biggest impressions when I play TETR.IO, that is Quick Play 2, or should I say, the Zenith Tower. It's like Ascending to Heaven, but with lore. The artwork, the soundtrack, the idea is so astonishing and charming. You climb the tower, together with people, defend yourself, attack others, and climb higher, exploring hotel, casino, and other stuff. Zenith Clicker is also astonishing work as well, and I am super impressed about it, you interact with the cards to climb the tower. Simple, but fun.

TETR.IO also offers me single player mode, I can use it to learn stuff with 40 lines, compete myself against 2-min pace. Or if I am feeling heavy, Zen mode is actually good to let me sit back and heal myself. Just like when I have a terrible day and the first thing to do is to boot up the game, and enjoy. Playing TETR.IO is like playing chess. If you misdrop, or doing a bad decision, you will be topped out and fail. The game also improved, sharpened my mind to work on other aspect of life as well, and I'm appreciated it! That's why, it is better for me to spend money on TETR.IO and osu! supporters than wasting my time and money on rhythm arcade games. That's really it.

I wrote this on 31/03/2026, updated on 14/04/2026, although my chest is still having sudden pain, but I'm on my Ascension journey. And while the future might be unclear, I will make sure that, I can be a captain of my life. Kinder outside, but my heart is frozen inside. I am advancing the journey with new friends, and new experiences. I will not leaving osu! game and TETR.IO, at least this year. There will be projects that will need me to complete, and I am open for it. I promise, that I will stand strong, even though my heart is bleeding and freezing. I wish everyone will have their best life. Let's be friends, together.

"Did someone say "heaven"?" Maguneshiumu materializes out of thin air, holding a big leaf, and a green cursor. Before you can reply, he jumps in and starts grabbing the fruits falling on top of his head, and slam it on to the wooden table, shaking the entire area. "No one called that word!", you yelled out, hoping he would stop, but it is too late. He has bombed your heaven with a lot of fruits he obtained. You fall down as your heaven is cracked with his result of 97.05% acc on Ascension to Heaven.

「誰か『天国』って言った？」マグネシウムが突然現れ、大きな葉っぱと緑色のカーソルを手にしている。返事をする間もなく、彼は飛び込んできて頭上に落ちてくる果物を掴み、木製のテーブルに叩きつけ、辺り一帯を揺らし始めた。「誰もそんな言葉は言ってない！」とあなたは叫び、彼が止まることを願ったが、もう遅かった。彼は手に入れた大量の果物であなたの天国を爆撃したのだ。天国がひび割れ、あなたは落下し、彼の「Ascension to Heaven」の成功率は97.05%だった。

"Did someone say "heaven"?" Maguneshiumu materializes out of thin air, holding a big leaf, a green cursor, determined. Before they can reply, he jumps in and grab all the fruits falling on top of his head, and slam it on to the wooden table, shaking the ground and nearby trees. "No one called that word!", they yelled it with cold-hearted voice and a death smile, hoping that he would stop his childish action. But it is too late. He overdashes, he misses a lot of fruits, he misclicks and misses lots off circles, but he survives. He even sends all the "fruits" to bomb their ideal heaven. They fall into tiredness as their heaven, their only hope, their ego are cracked with his result they can't reach. A 96% on Ascension to Heaven [Final Moment - osu! catch]. A 93% on Happy End of the World [Finale - osu! catch]. And a 68% on Ascension to Heaven [Insane - osu! standard]. All are 5* maps, and they don't even have a No Mod Clear on the leaderboard of any of those maps while pathetically trying to mock him.

「誰か『天国』って言った？」マグネシウムが突然現れ、大きな葉っぱと緑のカーソルを手に、決意を固めている。返事をする前に、彼は飛び込んできて頭上に落ちてくる果物を全部掴み、木のテーブルに叩きつけ、地面と近くの木々を揺らす。「誰もそんな言葉は言ってない！」と、冷酷な声と死にそうな笑みで叫び、彼の子供じみた行動をやめさせようとする。しかし、もう遅い。彼はダッシュしすぎて、たくさんの果物を逃し、クリックミスをしてたくさんのサークルを逃すが、生き残る。彼はさらに、すべての「果物」を彼らの理想の天国に爆撃させる。彼らは、天国、唯一の希望、自尊心が、彼が到達できない結果で砕け散り、疲れ果てていく。 Ascension to Heaven [Final Moment - osu! catch] で 96%。 Happy End of the World [Finale - osu! catch] で 93%。そして Ascension to Heaven [Insane - osu! standard] で 68%。すべて 5* マップで、リーダーボードにはそれらのマップの No Mod Clear すらなく、情けないことに彼を嘲笑おうとしています。

"Did someone say MKO?" Caboozled materialises out of thin air, holding a large bag over his shoulder. Before you can reply, he whips out L and J pieces from the bag, and then slams them on the floor, cracking the ceramic. "Nobody said MKO!" you yell in desperation, but its too late - Caboozled had already stacked 4 floating TSDs in your living room. You close your eyes in resignation to your fate, as your house is obliterated with a massive 50 spike.

(Thanks Kalanjack!)