I'm no longer able to improve in any meaningful way. My fingers can't move any faster, my wrist hurts every time I try to push, switching to HE completely ruined my skills as I try to adapt to it, and the negative feedback loop of my mental state just makes everything even worse. This is also partly the reason why I don't want to get an HE keyboard, because I was afraid that it wouldn't help in any way and would just be a waste of money, and unfortunately that seems to be the case.

I'm not quitting this game yet, it helped define who I am and I've met amazing people over the 12 years I've been on here. But to help preserve my sanity and avoid burning myself out completely, I'll stop engaging in pp-related activities (ranking up, grinding maps to improve pp, etc.), at least until I can reach the same level as before. I'll still be lurking around in lazer, playing Beatmap Spotlights, Project Loved and other things that osu! devs cook up, but I'll not grind my ass off for single digit pp improvement anymore, it's just not fun.

It's been a good run, but it's time to pass the torch to more capable players. Thank you all for supporting me ❤️

You probably know who you are. Welcome back, I hope you can enjoy this game once again, despite all the things that happened.

So...I'm #1 now, but at what cost? It doesn't feel great to me, considering that I've barely improved (some people might disagree, please keep on reading)

The first #1 (Epi75) is a Korean, and has changed his flag to Korea. The second #1 (Joki_) migrated to NZ and also changed his flag. He also seems to have lost interest in the game. That leaves me (and a few others) to carry the 7k scene from now on. The only one that has the potential to beat me (Seiren Shikino) has also nearly quit w entirely, while the others are so far behind that it'll take them a few years to match what I can do today (no offense to all of you, please keep playing, you all have my support ❤️)

With all the pros gone, the current people needing a few years to catch up, and the new generation not caring about 7k at all, this is probably the last time VN has competitive 7k players, unless things change in the future. It might also be the last time VN is competitive, period. The current community has degenerated to basically "haha funny chordjack maps", with no one having enough skills for MWC, or even 4dMWC. It really saddens me seeing everything deteriorates like that, but who am I to complain...

One day, I'll also leave this game for good, VN will become just another country, and all the incredible achievements will be lost to time. At least I'm thankful that I joined the game at the right time, and was able to meet all those amazing people. Thank you all ❤️